I want to introduce you to my little dog Angel. He is a full-grown, 5 lb Maltese who is just as cute as he can be! But let me tell you Angel’s story. Several years back, he and I stepped out the front door of our home for a walk. We hadn’t gone too far when all of a sudden an unleashed pit-bull rushed at us and viciously attacked Angel. It was horrible to say the least! All I could do was tug on Angel’s leash and try to pull him away from the mad dog to no avail. It wasn’t until the owner of the pit-bull grabbed his dog that Angel was saved from certain destruction. Since that horrible day, my once sweet little puppy has never been the same. Due to what Angel went through he is now very temperamental and defensive. Although he is a cute, loving and a faithful companion, the slightest little thing will set him off and he goes into attack mode against those who love and care for him. On occasion he has even bitten me for no reason when he has felt threatened due to what he went through with the pit-bull.

The reason why I shared Angel’s story is because at times we all can live our lives like Angel based on reactive adaptive learning. This simply means we live our today based on what happened to us in our past. This especially rings true when we have been wounded in some type of way through a traumatic or hurtful occurrence in our life. Just like Angel, we react defensively to protect ourselves and to maintain some sense of control. The problem is that our negative reactions can sabotage opportunities and crucial relationships with people God has placed in our lives to love, help or assist us in our purpose and destiny.

I want to encourage to look back over your life, and examine whether you are sabotaging your future (destiny) because you are living your today based on your negative experiences of yesterday. Moving forward you must be like Paul, “Forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark…” (Philippians 3:13-14). Also remember that God is your defense (Psalm 62:2). He is more than able to protect you when you feel threatened and no longer in control.

Your Next Step Coaching for Success Minute:

• Identify times in your life where you have been wounded. What has been your response to others because of the wounding?
• How do you respond when you feel threatened or lose control of a situation?
• List relationships or opportunities you might have sabotaged because of your negative or defensive reaction.

© Tarsha L. Campbell, All Rights Reserved, Use only with permission.